Monday, 3 February 2014

The Fastest Players in World Football XI

1. GK - Joe Hart (Manchester City)

It's hard to judge a goalkeeper as they don't do much running on the pitch, but England shot stopper Joe Hart is lightening quick. He showed us all how fast he really was after he ran back from the box in the final seconds of the Manchester Derby.

He charged down the pitch after United counter attacked, leaving all his fellow defenders behind him to save them from conceding a second. Nobody could quite believe how quick Hart was.

2. RB - Ignazio Abate (AC Milan)

The Italian is one of the quickest defenders in the world.

Abate's best asset is pace and for a while it seemed like his only asset. But this season he has come on leaps and bounds and is slowly becoming a regular in the Milan side.

3. CB - Marvell Wynne (Colorado Rapids)

The defender was tipped to become an athlete as a youngster after clocking a time of 10.39 seconds in the 100m as a senior in high school.

Ironically, he plays for the Colorado Rapids in the MLS and is officially the world's fastest professional footballer.

The 27-year-old has played for the New York Red Bulls and Toronto as well as Colorado Rapids.

thiago-silva4. CB - Thiago Silva (Paris St Germain)

PSG spent a huge £42 million on the Brazilian defender because of his pace, power and composure.

The centre back has speed in abundance. This season he has been prolific and a number of pacey strikers have not been able to pass the 29-year-old for the French side.

The combination of speed, agility and power has seen the Defender labelled as one of the best in the world, even earning him a deserved place in the FIFPro team of the year.

5. LB - Gael Clichy (Manchester City)

The Frenchman still has to be one of the fastest defenders in Europe despite his re-occurring injury problems that have hampered the 28-year-old's career.

When fit, he can be a consistent performer who brings bags of pace to the squad. His marauding runs and overlaps can be a dangerous asset, as shown here in the clip from when he played for Arsenal a few years back.

100% fully fit, he can be one of the best defenders in the league.

6. LM - Gareth Bale (Real Madrid)

You may want to ask former Inter Milan defender Maicon about how fast Gareth Bale is.

He made the Brazilian look slow in the 2010 Champions League tie as he battered the Italians on his own.

The Welshman was clocked at a speed of 25mph against Villareal this season. One of the quickest in La Liga and around the world.

7. CM - Ramires (Chelsea)

The Chelsea star may not be the most skillful or flamboyant of players, but he makes up with it with pace. Lots of it.

He is extremely quick and has the stamina to back his play up, tracking back at every available opportunity.

A key player who gives the team speed and acceleration.

8. RM - Theo Walcott (Arsenal)

The England international began showing signs of speed at an early age.

He recorded a time of 11.52 seconds in a 100m sprint as a 14-year-old and is now running just under 10.6 seconds, burning top Premier League defenders week in-week out for Arsenal.

cristiano-ronaldo-real-madrid19. AMC - Cristiano Ronaldo (Real Madrid)

The Ballon d'Or winner once ran 96 metres in 10 seconds in a match against Atletico Madrid in 2012.

The Portugese star is known for his fantastic dribbling skills and is one of the best in the world for using his pace to go past players.

He once famously raced a Bugatti Veyron and matched it's speed, unfortunately it was only a commercial. If only Cristiano, if only.

10. ST - Pierre Emerick Aubameyang (Borussia Dortmund)

The French-Gabonese striker once covered 30 metres in an incredible 3.7 seconds. This is faster than Usain Bolt ran at the start of his record-breaking 100m race in Berlin 2009.

The Dortmund striker has impressed since joining the German side, scoring 10 goals in 17 games. His ability to run past players with his lightning speed is a main factor in his successful scoring run over the past few seasons.

The forward has many years ahead of him at the age of 24. There is an exciting future ahead for sure.

11. ST - Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa)

The Aston Villa striker is one of the fastest players in the Premier League at the moment. The 26-year-old is capable of running the 100m sprint in 10.98 seconds.

The Englishman is another player who has struggled with injury in the past couple of seasons, but when on form he can be deadly infront of goal with his unpredictable bursts of pace.

He is the Villans' all time leading goalscorer in the Premier League, scoring 66 goals since 2005.

Source: FTBPro.com

And here is a video of how quick Cristiano Ronaldo can be!

Monday, 27 January 2014

The bad blacks

In Uganda, where class boundaries are heavily policed, working class people with bourgeois aspirations have become an ongoing source of tension. Moses Serubiri explores cars, music and sex as the terrain where Kampala's class wars play out

Ugandan musician Fred Sebatta became a "Bad Black" when he managed a crossover hit in 1996 with his song "Dole y'Omwana (Child's Doll)". The song was a vivid portrayal of Uganda's middle class: housewife, husband with a car, living in a gated compound, with a few maids.

Sebatta sought to transform his old downtown sound into something with popular appeal among Uganda's fast-growing uptown middle class audience.

He started making songs in the downtown clubs of Kampala during the late 1970s.

The tension between the urban and the rural, local and international, were embedded in this music from the beginning.

In a strange twist, the most-loved songs released in this genre during the late 1980s were all themed around HIV. This was, in part, the result of a nationwide, foreign donor-aided campaign against the epidemic. But it was also because the anti-HIV message gave artists access to digital production technology in donor countries. Songs by artists such as Philly Bongole Lutaaya and Paulo Kafeero were regularly produced in Sweden.

Sebatta knew that producer Steve Jean had gone to the US and brought back the digital equipment he needed to transform the music on his own terms. Sebatta and Jean sat down in front of the computer and scanned Jean's imported digital sound effects until they found the racing of a car engine. It immediately sparked Sebatta's imagination. He sat down and, drawing on his background of writing poetic Luganda monologues in the underground scene, penned the complex story that captured the dilemma of Uganda's middle class.

Dole y'Omwana became 1996's biggest radio hit. After it skyrocketed, Sebatta changed his name to Lord Fred Sebatta and disowned the downtown music scene. His new-found glory was short-lived. In adopting and adapting middle class subject matter and sounds, the "village musician" had overstepped an unwritten boundary in Ugandan society.

The song's hook, a simple metaphor centred on a child's doll, typical of the "village music" tradition, became his Achilles heel.

The roar of a car's engine opens the track, followed by a woman's voice (the wife) singing: "How did he start the car? I didn't see him leave the house; the child is restless! How did he open the gate! I am not used to these sloppy maids. Now he's carried the doll inside the car; my baby will cry all day."

The media firestorm that followed united Uganda's middle class against Sebatta. Acting on the growing sense of public outrage, Uganda's media council accused Sebatta of writing pornographic content. Was it in the wife's pleas for the child's doll? Or the husband's aggressive response to her pleas: "How can a man of power, such as I, play with a child's doll?"

Certainly, Sebatta's doll could be read as a metaphor for sex, but compared to the sexually explicit lyrics of popular US artists such as R Kelly and Usher, which regularly topped the charts at the time, Sebatta's sex was sheathed, barely insinuated.

This discrepancy was seemingly lost on the media council, an organisation notorious for protecting elite interests. They went ahead with the ban, claiming it was to protect juvenile listeners.

Sebatta was stunned by the accusations. He had not anticipated the middle class backlash against him.

What territory has the middle class occupied in Uganda? After independence in 1962, the middle class consistently grew their wealth.

Milton Obote, Uganda's president from 1966 to 1971, set the example by taking over the country homes and expensive cars of colonial officers. He famously renamed the Crested Crane Hotel room where Queen Elizabeth slept during her visit to Uganda in 1954 the "Presidential Suite".

This perfectly illustrates Frantz Fanon's view of the "native bourgeoisie … who use class aggressiveness to corner the positions formerly kept for foreigners". Nowhere is this more visible than in Obote's love for luxurious cars, such as his cherished Mercedes-Benz Cross Country.

The myth of these cars endures. One day in a passenger taxi van, I listened to several minutes of praise by the taxi driver. He delivered a soliloquy on Obote's Mercedes-Benz SUV: the flag on the bonnet and the personalised numberplate, among other details. I did not expect to hear details of Obote's lifestyle in the taxi van, a predominantly working class space.

And yet, here was this taxi driver praising Obote's lifestyle. Who was he? Why was he so supportive of the middle class lifestyle? Was he a secret member of the bourgeoisie masking his wealth behind the taxi wheel?

Since Yoweri Museveni's regime came to power in 1986, economic policy adjustments have allowed the middle class' wealth to grow rapidly as foreign investor money floods into Kampala. It has meant that the middle class has copied the nationalist, bourgeois tendencies of politicians like Obote and Idi Amin Dada: they have bought expensive cars, built large houses and bought vast tracts of land throughout the country.

But this flagrant display of wealth has also triggered working class aspirations to rise to meet the bourgeoisie. The "Bad Blacks", as they are popularly known, have become a source of tension in Uganda, where class boundaries are actively enforced and heavily policed.

One of the most famous (or infamous) Bad Blacks broke into bourgeois territory in 2009, after striking gold by gaining access to a foreign investor's bank account. It was the Ugandan tabloids that first brought this Bad Black into the national consciousness, reporting anecdotes about a 25-year-old woman who bought everyone drinks in clubs and paid strictly cash.

This Bad Black wasn't always bad or rich. She was born Shanita Namuyimbwa and raised in a working class Muslim family in Kampala during the 1980s. She had barely finished her first year of high school when she joined the city's street-smart academy.

On the streets, Namuyimbwa would have learnt the phrase "Kampala si kibuga kya ba falla; bwooba falla ofa oli yala (Kampala is not a city for fools; if you're a fool, you die hungry)". She would have quickly realised that at this school, you had to have real ambition.

Opportunity finally knocked for the young streetwalker on an ordinary working day, on Speke Road. There she met David Greenhalgh, a wealthy English investor looking for a good time.

She later told the Uganda high court that it was the sexual relationship between them that birthed the Daveshan Development, the real estate company of which she would eventually become a co-director. It was also what made her the sole signatory of a $3.5 million (R38.5 million) "love account".

Namuyimbwa was seemingly living every street girl's dream. Despite her newly acquired wealth, however, she was unable to gain access to the guest lists of Kampala's bourgeoisie. Excluded from the society she courted, she returned to the territory she knew best: the streets.

There she acted out her frustration through spontaneous public displays of her new-found wealth. On one particular afternoon, at one of Kampala's major intersections, Namu-yimbwa jumped out of her Mercedes-Benz SUV and "made it rain" with 50 000 Ugandan shilling (R200) bills.

Bad Black's behaviour might have appeared bizarre, but it was deeply rooted in Uganda's fraught class history. It's impossible to listen to stories of her cruising the club scene in a motorcade led by her black Mercedes-Benz M-Class sporting the custom numberplate "BLACK GAL", without recalling Milton Obote, who cruised through Kampala followed by a fleet of black Benzes, sirens wailing. These historic references secured her mythic status.

If Bad Black hoped to gain the elite's attention with her antics, she certainly succeeded. It wasn't long before the upper echelons of Ugandan society began to question where she got her money. The Ugandan Anti-Corruption Court started asking the same question. A subsequent commissioned inquisition into her bank account landed Bad Black in the high court of Uganda, where she faced embezzlement charges.

Catherine Bamugemereire, the judge in the anti-corruption court case, did not find Bad Black's access to the account illegal. Daveshan Company documents clearly showed that she was a signatory on the account.

However, in a typical display of post-colonial class aggression, the judge painted the foreign investor, David Greenhalgh, as the victim in the case.

The court charged Bad Black, along with her boyfriend Meddie Sentongo, with conspiracy to defraud David Greenhalgh of a reported $9 million, and sentenced them to four years in jail.

In a society where corruption is rampant, and where it is facilitated by close, symbiotic relationships between government bureaucrats and businessmen, the aggression with which both the Ugandan media and the legal establishment pursued Bad Black raises questions.

That Bad Black's relationship with Greenhalgh was opportunistic is hard to dispute - she herself provided explicit evidence of how their sexual relationship sparked off the opening of the Daveshan company account. But was Greenhalgh really just a passive victim of a conniving street girl?

The company's name, Daveshan (David and Shanita) offers one answer. Greenhalgh was a co-signatory of the company's account and clearly aware of how Bad Black was spending the cash. This discrepancy was indirectly raised by the court, when the judge asked Greenhalgh why he would give an "uneducated" village woman access to so much money. The judge's framing of the question speaks for itself.

Were Bad Black's actions on trial or was it her background and lack of education that we deemed suspect? Was it that she spent the money, or rather how she spent the money?

What is certain is that in Ugandan society, Bad Black was guilty before she entered the court. She became a Bad Black when she aspired to cross class boundaries. She became the baddest Bad Black when she indiscriminately flaunted her success.

Bad Black had one final fling with the high life when she jumped bail within a few months of starting her sentence, after she appealed to the court to be released to have her breast implants removed.

Many have stressed the judge's tomfoolery in that decision. One comment on New Vision's website reads: "Even a four-year-old African child knew she would never come back …" After jumping bail, Bad Black partied in Malaysia, but was finally caught in transit at an airport in Rwanda by Interpol in October last year.

The story of Fred Sebatta and the banning of his 1996 hit "Dole y'Omwana" and the trial of Namuyimbwa (Bad Black) are generations apart, but they share a common theme: when the working class downtown musician or the uptown prostitute rises to a level of countrywide acclaim, they are always at the mercy of an African middle class, intent on aggressively policing its territory.

» This piece first appeared in Chimurenga Chronic, a quarterly Pan-African gazette published by Chimurenga. The new edition is available in bookstores, or for order or download, at chimurengachronic.co.za

The post The bad blacks appeared first on City Press.

Thursday, 2 January 2014

The List: Crazy Club Owners

With Vincent Tan causing chaos at Cardiff City, we take a look at some other club owners who have wreaked havoc at their respective clubs.

5. Maurizio Zamparini, Palermo

Zamparini is arguably the most difficult-to-please owner in football as the fiery Italian has gone through a mind-blowing 30 managers since mid-2000, with six different men having been in charge this year alone!

Always up for a gem of a sound byte, Zamparini has over the years 1) threatened to castrate his players and eat their testicles in his salad, 2) claimed that all referees in Italy should be behind bars, 3) referred to England as a 'land of pirates', and 4) called Adrian Mutu a 'crafty gypsy'.

4. Ratko Butorovic, FK Vojvodina

By all accounts, Butorovic had a positive influence on the Serbian club, but he had to be included for his incredibly garish dress sense.

 Butorovic

3. Luciano Gaucci, Perugia

Gaucci will forever be known for his unbelievable decision to terminate the contract of South Korea international Ahn Jung-Hwan in 2002 after he scored the golden-goal that eliminated Italy from the World Cup that year.

The 74-year old provided this pearler when asked why he had sacked the striker: "I have no intention of paying a salary to someone who has ruined Italian football."

Some of his other indiscretions include signing former Libyan dictator Colonel Gaddafi's son Saadi, who made one substitute appearance before failing a drug test and being slapped with a three-year ban; attempting to sign the captain of the Sweden women's national team; and offering a referee a racehorse as a bribe.

2. Gigi Becali, Steaua Bucharest

From vetoing transfers from inside his jail cell to commissioning artworks depicting him as Jesus Christ in The Last Supper, sending loanee Rafal Grzelak back to his parent club in 2010 for being follically challenged after declaring, "there aren't any great bald football players," and a slew of racist, homophobic and xenophobic outbursts, Becali has done it all.

1. Ken Richardson, Doncaster Rovers

When a club is in financial trouble the first plan is usually to seek an injection of funds from legal avenues, but Richardson had other ideas as he plotted to burn down the club's Belle Vue ground and sell the land to developers.

He hired three men to carry out the deed - including a former SAS operative - and the trio succeeded in razing the stadium to the ground. Justice was served, however, as the SAS-man-turned-arsonist left his mobile phone at the scene and Richardson was sentenced to four years in prison.

A man described by detectives as "the type that would trample a two-year old child to pick up a 2p bit", Richardson also made a madcap appointment of a former club shop owner as manager of Rovers - who unsurprisingly led the team to relegation with a negative 83 goal difference.

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Wednesday, 1 January 2014

Remembering Mandela: 10 Inspirational Quotes

fe3cabc258f5b5feb0849a54d34bb8e0Madiba taught South Africa and the world so much about love, peace and unity. Here are ten of his most inspiring quotes:

  • "A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination."
  • "We must use time wisely and forever realize that the time is always ripe to do right."
  • "Never, never and never again shall it be that this beautiful land will again experience the oppression of one by another."
  • "Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies."
  • "There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living."
  • "Let freedom reign. The sun never set on so glorious a human achievement."
  • "Our human compassion binds us the one to the other - not in pity or patronizingly, but as human beings who have learnt how to turn our common suffering into hope for the future."
  • "No one is born hating another person because of the colour of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite."
  • "What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead."
  • "Death is something inevitable. When a man has done what he considers to be his duty to his people and his country, he can rest in peace. I believe I have made that effort and that is, therefore, why I will sleep for the eternity."

All images have been taken from the internet. Love.mymuti.com does not take credit for any of the images used in this post.